Tunic colour and a Son of the Earth

I had an email yesterday from a farmer in Somerset asking for advice on raising brand awareness and penetrating an oversubscribed market. (Hint: this is EXACTLY what I'm here for). I haven't written out the email because it was full of spelling mistakes, bad grammer and makes him sound pretty stupid! Sorry, David, but it does!

So far, my advice to David (or Farmer X as he might want to be known now!) is to start with a strong outdoor poster campaign (maybe in central London at first) for instant impact, roll out banner ads on hot websites and then launch interactive bluetooth bus-stop ads in the pre-Christmas rush.

If anyone else has advice on selling on small quantities of surplus maize and barley, then post a comment below! Delivery can be within a 10-mile radius of Upper Cheddon but not in a town centre or up the motorway due to restrictions on where tractors can go. (Hint: buy a car, slowcoach!)

Sadly still no sign of the photo of me in a kaftan or the camera, or any of the other stuff I would need to recreate the photo and post it here. I'm going to try and post a picture anyway because I've never done it before. Here goes!

Brilliant! This is a picture of Robbert Coltrane as Hagrid! Not, I repeat, not a picture of me in a kaftan (although his tunic is much the same colour, in case you are trying to picture the kaftan).